Monday, October 24, 2011

what is attractiveness?

a few thoughts...

one thing that i hate the most is when people (especially girls) think that they have little or no worth because they think that they are not attractive. i don't hate the girls, i hate our materialistic and perfectionistic society that tries to define beauty as something so shallow.

i think i can honestly say that i find all girls attractive. i find them attractive for a variety of reasons. sometimes physical appearance makes an impact, but it is not a deciding factor in my evaluation of an individual.

unfortunately, it has become all too common for a person to be judged by their looks. it is understandable, to an extent. after all, the first impression you get of someone comes from seeing them. whether we like it or not, it is impossible to understand a person after a first impression. when we try to make a judgment of an individual after seeing them for the first time, or perhaps after only a short conversation, the only judgment you can make is based on physical appearance.

while it is understandable that physical appearance is used as a basis for judgment, it is not a good indicator of a person's beauty or worth.

when i say that every girl is attractive, some have raised the criticism that i am doing the same as those that say 'everyone is special.' apparently if everyone is special, that means that no one is actually special. i disagree. in his book Ender's Game, Orson Scott Card writes about Ender's character as he studies his alien enemy. Ender says, "In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him." i agree with Card. it is impossible to truly come to know someone, even an enemy, without loving them. and in the case of members of the fairer gender, finding them beautiful.

perhaps there are many others that feel as i do. but sometimes girls' don't feel appreciated because they aren't told that they are beautiful. and perhaps they don't feel beautiful when they aren't asked out but the next girl is.

as usual i feel like i have few answers. but this much i know--we should treat all people with love. we should also treat all people as equals. no one is "better" or "cooler" because they have certain physical features. we don't get to decide how we look, so we should not let it affect who we are or how we treat others. nothing is more sad than a person who has allowed themselves to become limited because of their looks or because of the way they have been treated because of their looks.

additionally, we should treat ourselves like we are beautiful. we might not look like the "perfect" guy or girl, but who does? i have big ears and i'm balding. who cares? we are all blessed with life, and we are created by a perfect God. any imperfections we have are a part of us, and who am i to complain about what i have been given?

i am glad to be who i am, and i am grateful for all of the beautiful and amazing people around me. i hope that we can look for and find beauty in all people, and treat each other as we should be treated.


i like the following video. i don't know if many billboards are made this way, but this is an interesting insight into our world. we are obsessed with physical perfection, but none of us are perfect in this way.


  1. So what you're saying is that girls are actually buggers and we need to love them before we destroy their kind? haha, jk. Great post Jeremy!

  2. Love it Jeremy! Very insightful :) Wish more girls would listen to you.

  3. Here's a good article from a website dedicated to this very topic.

  4. Thank you Jeremy. I don't know if this has changed my view on certian things. But I found it very helpful with things that are going on right now! I miss you kiddo.

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